I’m finishing a new porcelain costumed doll to be available for sale this summer!
She is Princess Tuvstarr, from John Bauer’s iconic illustrations of the Swedish fairy tale “Skutt the Moose and Princess Tuvstarr”, by Helge Kjellin. In english it is known as Leap the Elk and Little Princess Cottongrass.
It’a a story of a vulnerable but adventurous young girl leaving her sheltered childhood home to explore the world with her protective, but conflicted friend, encountering dangerous strangers, making costly choices and losing everything along the way, including her own agency and identity. The story is sad, but compelling because loss is a fundamental part of the human condition.
This doll has been in the works for over 3 years, but was interrupted by a traumatic loss of someone I loved, and it changed me. I felt a fracturing of self and a loss of agency over my life as I was paralysed by grief and existential terror.
Like the trapped Princess Tuvstarr, who endlessly searches for her lost heart in the dark forest pond, I was stuck replaying the chain of events that transpired on a horrible, continuous loop inside my head for many months until it felt like I would surely go insane. I questioned all my choices and decisions that had lead to this irreversible outcome, as if obsessive rumination could somehow unlock a door to the past, change a moment in time, and create an alternate present where my heart is not broken.
I began working on Princess Tuvstarr as one person, but finished her as someone different, and this doll and this fairy tale have gained a new symbolism and meaning to me. Perhaps one day MY Princess Tuvstarr will find her lost heart again, regain her identity and be able to leave the forest.
This Forest photoshoot was a part of the journey. Next week I’m heading back into the forest to shoot the completed Princess Tuvstarr-Cottongrass in full costume. Stay tuned for costumed photos and purchase info.
“Where are you taking me?” she asks. “To Forest Moss,” Leap answers. “I live there. No one comes there and it’s far away.”
“They travel a while, then the forest begins to thin, and the princess looks out over a mile-long marsh, where tufts of sedge come together in soft hollows and hillocks, and where the little stunted bushes on the bank haven’t the courage to follow.”
“...Soon they are there. The low hill rises above the marsh, and it is dry and delightful among the fir trees and pines. The princess kisses her dear friend Leap good-night, undresses, and hangs her gown neatly on a branch. She lies down and is soon asleep, with the long-legged elk to stand guard over her. It is almost night, and a few small stars are twinkling in the sky.”
“Here is where I live,” says Leap. “This is where we shall sleep.”
“The elk had been awake all night watching over the strange, white little girl on the ground, and that morning there had been tears in its eyes. It did not understand why, except it felt autumn approaching and was seized by a longing to do battle and be with his own kind.”
“Next morning the princess is awakened by the soft touch of the elk’s muzzle on her forehead. She jumps up quickly, stretches naked in the golden-red morning light, and then collects a few dew drops to drink in her hands.”
“Now they are traveling through a large, strange forest. The long branches of the firs are covered with hanging moss, the tree roots bend like snakes and large, lichen-covered boulders seem to threaten them from the side of the path. The princess has never seen such a queer place before.
“What is that moving deep in the woods?” she asks. “I think I see long green hair and a pair of white arms waving to me.”
“Many years have passed. Still Princess Cottongrass sits and looks wonderingly into the water for her heart. She is no longer a little girl. Instead, a slender plant, crowned with white cotton, stands leaning over the edge of the pool. Now and then the elk returns, stops, and looks at it tenderly. ”
“Only he knows that this is the princess from Dream Castle. Perhaps she nods and smiles, for he is an old friend, but she does not want to follow him back; she cannot follow anymore, as long as she is under the spell. The spell lies in the pool. Far, far under the water lies a lost heart.”
